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Covid 19, thanks for the update on our relationships and ourselves

Let's for once try and be open and admit the status of our relationships, personal, social, professional. How does it feel now that Covid 19 has provided us with a formal excuse not to interact so much with others? As always there are pros and cons. Pros relate to simply not having to even take a look at those with whom one does not fit. Cons relate to realizing that those are too many. But then again there's another prο: strengthening yourself so as to be able to survive without the placebo of being around people whom you may have thought to be compatible.

Once one manages to acquire that strength, then you may realize how different life can be. Emotional independence can be the key that will set you free from your daily pretence acts. And then you may be able to express your true self so as to see if you really like it. If you do, then you won't need any confirmation from anyone. If you don't, then you may be able to start trimming the rough edges and improve. But make no mistake: in order to go through the process, you need first to have the desire, courage and EQ to expose and face yourself. If those three preconditions are not there, then you had better stay in bed.

Is political correctness overstated?

During the last two to three decades at least, there has been a complete shift of focus from unprocessed openness to sophisticated political correctness. The latter is commonly confused with qualities such as soft skills, communication or even politeness.

For what it's worth, it looks like to some of us that this is simply a "trick" that mostly introvert people use (as extroverts usually cannot and do not want to hide their intentions), so as to camouflage their real agendas, feelings and ultimately achieve their objectives, professional, social, personal.

So we've now reached the far end of the spectrum, where instead of appreciating authenticity, real feelings and intentions (as long as those are politely expressed of course), we now consider political correctness as a very valuable attribute while ignoring the lack of human substance underneath the first layer.

I don't think so. Whenever I sense unsubstantiated political correctness on the other side, I start packing.

Toxic is bad for our health

How many times per day do you encounter toxic people emanating a negative aura? Well, a lot you may say if you think about it. But do you realize it when it happens? Or do you simply take it inside and move on without reacting at all? If you do the latter it's certain that it will develop into some kind of a physical symptom in your body. If you act out on it, then you will have to absorb the tension and consume valuable energy. It's a lose-lose situation either way.

We are surrounded by insensitive, emotion deprived, rude, uncultivated, self-absorbed, ignorant zero-sum people. They are everywhere making it very hard to emotionally survive on a professional, social and of course personal level. For those knowledgeable enough, you have already realized how vain, pointless, useless it can be to even attempt communicating with this kind of species by investing even a nanosecond of your time.

So do what's best for you. Ignore their presence, avoid interacting with them for whatever reason. And if you are lucky enough you may find this other species who are sensitive, caring, mindful, meaning well for you. It's very rare of course, maybe extinct, so if you haven't found them yet, no worries, keep looking when you are in the mood for communicating with someone. Or stay on your own. Don't ever compromise on toxic. It's bad for your health.

Is the customer always right? Maybe not...

That's some kind of an axiom, more like a dogma I've been nurtured with all my life, professional and academic. But is this true in real, practical terms? Well, it could be if somebody is selling something which is 100% clearly identified and the terms of sale are absolutely transparent to both the buyer and the seller.

But what happens when the client is not 100% knowledgeable of what it is they are looking for? While at the same time they are amazingly willing to pay substantial amounts for whatever it is that they are looking for. To my experience, most if not all clients looking for services to be provided, need some serious help in exactly this: To determine what it is they're asking for! I've rarely if never at all, come across a client who was able to determine specifically their expected deliverable. And even if it is assumed that the client may reach that point, then they may not be willing to go through what it takes in order to achieve the expected result. What happens usually is that a client may have some broad idea of what needs to be done, but the knowledge and experience to specifically identify the service required is not there.

And this is the beginning of the nightmare. It is both the client and the service provider that will end up in a situation where the former is unsatisfied and the latter is losing goodwill. So for god's sake, whenever a service provider becomes tedious and unexciting while trying to assist their client in determining the exact deliverables required, it's most likely the one you should be hiring, ceteris paribus. Service providers who are pleasant, exciting, scientifically knowledgeable, seemingly proficient and most of all communicative, can very easily misguide -not necessarily with intent- prospective clients instead of simply using a pen and a piece of paper, noting down exactly what it is that the client is looking for. And clients who are not willing to devote time and effort on determining their expectations?  Please politely avoid them.